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HOW I GOT INTO SCIENTOLOGY AND WHY I GOT OUT -- ILLUSTRATED INTERVIEW WITH JASON BEGHE |
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So they always pull out this fucking reference called "Pain and Sex." And he's talking about pain and sex are these things that are really dogging people, and it's a really difficult thing that we're trying to help you with in Scientology. And basically there's maybe two sentences in there where LRH says, "Through my research in the whole track of OT something-or-other, I just discovered that this is all because of psyches."
And that's the reference they tell you to prove that the fucking Hitler and rape is a thing. And I'm like, "Honey, that doesn't quite handle it." But they don't get it. Q. I look at this as an outsider, and to me -- and I don't have a vast knowledge of this -- it seems that the psychiatric field sprung forth in the 1800s, not thousands of years ago, or millions of years ago. How are there psyches on the whole track if there weren't psyches? A. Because these are THE evil people. These are the evil beings actually. And you hear about Xenu and all that shit? Xenu was a psyche. You got it? Q. So he just wasn't a practicing psychiatrist? A. No, he was practicing Xenuism. Got it? Now they're called psyches. So you better beware. Am I right? Fuck me. Q. I remember one time I visited the Celebrity Center, just walked in late at night, and looked around and said, "What goes on in here?" And they woke up the projectionist to show me the orientation in my own private screening. And they had some poor Sea Org kid, maybe 15 or 16 years old babysitting me in the theatre -- A. Well, you're not allowed to watch the movie alone because you could get an MU. He was watching to make sure you didn't have any lack of mass kind of shit.
Q. He was making small talk before that. He was saying, "You remember the Salem witch trials? It was the psyches behind that." "Well, I don't think there were psychiatrists back then." And he went "Oh no no no, not the psyches, I mean the pharmaceutical companies." A. Oh dear goodness. These are the kids you dash off a "Get Well Soon" card to and that's about it. Because it's sad. And this is the interesting thing, and it goes back to answer further the question of "What did you perceive?" What I perceived, and I kind of avoided the question by saying I got stupider, but let me tell you something. These are good people. These are some of the best people you can meet. These are people who really want to help. They're willing to give up their entire life and their own personal ambition to help others. That's pretty rare. And generally you would say it's a pretty decent person. And I would say, "I'm not a bad person." If I saw me walking around there I'd say, "He's okay." Q. When you say you got stupider, how do you think that happened? A. In my opinion, and again I'm only out of Scientology about a year or so -- less than a year, officially -- but in my opinion, what I've gathered as I wake up -- You know it's a funny thing in Scientology. You feel as though you're waking up to the truth or reality, what really is. But what you're doing is waking up to the reality of Scientology, which is the agreed-upon universe of what is.
And basically, in my opinion, the best thing you can be is yourself.
And that's who you are. And there are degrees to which you can actually become yourself. And that's probably what the whole spiritual interest is. For me, I don't really know. But the trick of Scientology is it makes you feel as though, you're sold that you're actually becoming yourself. But what you're actually becoming is -- my name's Jason Beghe -- I was becoming "Jason Beghe the Scientologist," rather than just, not even "Jason Beghe" but "me."
And the trick is, and you say, "How do I fall for this shit?" Go back to my first fucking win. Because it's me. It's me.
And so there IS you.
But then it's YOU through -- I can't explain it -- pressure of the group? This is the thing I'm trying to get, because I've never been a guy like "I've got to get a pair of those shoes, because everybody's wearing them."
It's more like, "I've got to find my own if everybody's wearing those things." But maybe that's how I got out to some degree. I mean, I'm not saying that I never bought a BMW, or whatever the fuck people want to do.
But to me it gives you a way of thinking.
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