Cry-Baby, Written and Directed by John Waters, Starring Johnny Depp, Amy Locane, Susan Tyrrell, Iggy Pop, Ricki Lake, Traci Lords -- Illustrated Screenplay

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CRY-BABY -- ILLUSTRATED SCREENPLAY

[PEPPER] [screaming]

[thunder clapping]

[engine revving]

[WADE] Get on.

[BALDWIN] Don't do it, Allison.

No!

***

[DRAPES] [Chanting as they are hauled off in the paddy wagon] Too smart to work, too cool to care.
Come to Turkey Point, man, if you dare.
Too smart to work, too cool to care.
Come to Turkey Point, man, if you dare.

[BALDWIN] L-Let her go. She's with me.
Her name is Allison and she is a nice girl.

[WADE] Allison, I'm sorry to get you locked up.
But tonight, well,
you were the coolest date I ever had.

[ALLISON] But, Cry-Baby, who is that girl?
Why didn't you tell me you already had a lady friend?

[WADE] That Lenora ain't nothing to me, I swear on my daddy's grave.
I'm burning inside to touch you, baby.

***

[REPORTER 1] How do you feel about
your granddaughter becoming a Drapette?

[REPORTER 2] Mrs. Vernon-Williams, a picture, please.

[MRS. VERNON WILLIAMS] Please, no pictures.

***

[people chattering]

[HATCHET] Get your hands off! Get your hands off of me!

[ALL] [shouting]

[WANDA] [sputters at her parents who wave to her]

[JUDGE] Order. Order in this courtroom.
What a sad vision of today's youth.

The juvenile authorities have had it with Drape gangs.

Milton Hackett.

Wanda Woodward.

Mona Malnorowski, also known as Hatchet-Face.

You are blights on this community.
Are the parents here?

[MR. HACKETT] Yes, Your Honor.

We have been praying all night for our son.

[MRS. HACKETT] And praying so hard that we got headaches.

[HECTOR] Hi, Wanda honey.

[MAGGIE] You were on the radio.

[WANDA] Would you just get me the fuck out of here?

[MAGGIE] What does "fuck" mean, Hector?

[HECTOR] Oh, Maggie, it's just a teen nonsense word Wanda uses
to make herself feel all grown-up.

[MAGGIE] Your Honor, could we take Wanda the fuck home?

[ALL] [laughing]

[gavel pounding]

[JUDGE] Good God!
Order. Order in this courtroom.

[MR. HACKETT]: You hear that, Your Honor? It's a sign.

[MRS. HACKETT] [speaking indistinctly]

[MR. HACKETT] She is speaking in tongues.
God is in her gullet. And he is in yours, too.

Let him out.

Let the words of the Savior be heard.

[JUDGE] Order! Order!

No wonder your children are in trouble.
And you, Miss Malnorowski ...
By the way, that's a shame about your face.

[HATCHET-FACE] There's nothing the matter with my face.

I got character.

[JUDGE] I see that your parents haven't taken the trouble
to come to get you.

[MR. MALNOROWSKI] Oh, yes, we did.

You happy now, Mona? You finally did it.

You put your own mother in an iron lung.

[JUDGE] Mrs. Malnorowski,

there is no smoking in this courtroom.

[MRS. MALNOROWSKI] Why not?

I pay taxes on cigarettes, don't I?

And what do I get for those taxes?
Happiness? Hell, no.
I get tuberculosis.

[tire explodes]

[MRS. MALNOROWSKI] Oh, Christ! Now I got a flat tire.

[JUDGE] I'm going to release these delinquents
to their parents' custody.
and if they were mine,

I'd give them a bare-assed whipping.

[RAMONA] Ohm, they can sing, Your Honor.
You should hear them.
Oh, it's new, it's exciting.

[BELVEDERE] We don't know what to call it.

It sort of rocks, man, it spins.

[RAMONA] Yeah.

[BELVEDERE] Let me get the right words. It twirls. It twirls.

[JUDGE] Ramona and Belvedere Rickettes,
I find you guilty of disturbing the peace

and I fine the both of you $1,000.

[RAMONA] That's all we have.

[BELVEDERE] How are we supposed to live?

[JUDGE] Damn you. Handcuff those brats.

[PEPPER] Don't touch my children.

[JUDGE] And you, Pepper Walker,
I'm going to have your two children

put in the custody of the Chatterbox Orphanage,
until they're adopted by God-fearing parents
who at least will give them Christian names.

[PEPPER] Not my children. They're my flesh and blood.
They're all I have!

[JUDGE] Mrs. Tadlock.

[PEPPER] Get away from them.

[ALL] [clamoring]

[RAMONA] Don't you touch them!

[MRS. TADLOCK] Come on.

[PEPPER] I love you, children.

[JUDGE] Wade Walker, better known as "Cry-Baby"

what a sad and silly name for a young man.

You were the ringleader in tonight's gang war.

[ALLISON] Grandmother, help him. We were just singing together.

[ALL] [murmuring]

[WADE] Judge, let Allison go and I'll take the full blame.

I didn't mean no harm, Mrs. Vernon-Williams.
I may be a Drape, but I love your granddaughter.
And if that's a crime, I'll stand convicted, ma'am.

[MRS. VERNON WILLIAMS] Your Honor, I am Allison's grandmother.
And, uh, if Mr. Walker does have musical talent,
I am willing to give him a second chance.
Won't you? The boy is at least polite.

[JUDGE] Mrs. Vernon-Williams,
are you aware that negroes were present at tonight's disturbance?

[MRS. VERNON WILLIAMS] My granddaughter is fond of all kinds of music.

[JUDGE] I am going to release Allison this one time,

because you are a fine and beautiful woman, Mrs. Vernon-Williams.

[ALL] [murmuring]

[JUDGE] But not you, Cry-Baby Walker.
The only place you're going to sing is in jail.

[ALLISON] No!

[JUDGE] I find you guilty

of rampant juvenile delinquency
and I hereby sentence you
to the Maryland Training School for Boys
until your 21st birthday.

[WADE] Ha!

[JUDGE] [banging gavel] Court dismissed.

[ALL] [exclaiming]

[JUDGE] Lock him up!

[RAMONA] You can't lock up his music!

[ALL] [clamoring]

[WADE] I'll get out, sugar dumpling. I'll get out if it's the last thing I do!
I swear.

[ALLISON] Cry-Baby!

***

[In The Jailhouse by Webb Pierce playing] He's in the jailhouse now;
He's in the jailhouse now
He's in the jailhouse now

[LENORA] Boy, do I have a story for you.

[REPORTER] How does it feel to be a juvenile delinquent?

[WADE] It feels good, man. I've never been so happy in my whole life.

[REPORTER] I hear you were ...

[WADE] Lenora, you filthy hag. I wouldn't let you shine my boots!
Allison's my girl.
A-L-L-I-S-O-N, fellows.

[REPORTER] When did he propose?

[reporters clamoring]

[LENORA] Oh, just last night.
You see, I'm pregnant with his child.
Well, you know that Cry-Baby is an orphan.
He wants his baby to have a real family
for the family that he himself never had.

***